Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Dreams and Despair

The first week of the New Year is the most depressing time. Its actually one week that has six Mondays in one row. You wake up with a feeling of a hangover knowing that you didn't even drink last evening. You seem lost and most of the people around you sound boring -- which happens otherwise as well -- its just that your toleration doesn't seem to last.
So where was I? I was actually in a farmhouse near the end of town -- Chattarpur, with a South Delhi accent -- where some four-hundred-and-twenty-six half-undressed women were sipping their stirred Martinis and refusing to believe that a word 'humility' actually exists. There was enough fog in the empty swimming pool to swim with them. But of course, when things were getting on a terrific wavelength -- I rise from this sweet sleep by someone nudging me asking: so what's the exact scene for this evening (New Year's Eve)?
I was in North Delhi, Delhi University, in a Baskin Robbins outlet where they have plush sofas, the one's where you have dreams like these. I'm not very adventurous, and so an evening with long lost friends seemed like a good idea. The Boxer was with a friend of his, Boxer II. The American Boy Brothers were coming as well. Others random as well. The Boxer's girlfriend, I realised: I was in love with her.
The evening was pretty cool. I was playing the fool well. Which is making people think that I'm completely wasted; at the same time not being at all but yes being slightly (recommended). I was poured whisky for my first drink and there was some vodka and beer that followed, as that got over. I was being overtly expressive as I ripped apart almost everybody with my sarcasm and twisted points of view -- the Boxer II looked at me in disbelief. He seemed unhappy I was there. It seemed I had violated his not-drinking, talking loudly about steroids, cursing women world. He would have beaten the shit out of me, its just that I didn't feel like being beaten on a New Year's Eve.
After years and years of misery-inflicted by the American boys; I think I got the feeling, they knew I was finally bored of their humour and I could counter if I wished. I was a bit distressed of The Boxer, I feared to even look at him while speaking. Fearing that my eyes would give away the love I had found for his girlfriend.
She looked familiar, she had the Keira Knightley-Snow White-Desdemona beauty. She of course liked me, and I bowed to have my thoughts be caught to be caught in her lashes. The American Boy I wanted Mary, and I was explaining him the way from Roop Nagar to Amsterdam but he rushed off to some dhobi ghaat. So he returned after an hour, with some shit-shit, and spent the exact 12 am with some unfriendly and unreasonable peddlar. It was all good.
"When you decide to be something, you can be it. That's what they don't tell you in the church. When I was your age they would say we can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?"

Watched The Departed, fucking mind-blowing. Scorsese's is a bloody mind-fucking genius. The movie starts with Stones' Gimme Shelter, and you know how it goes. The movie does get Tarantinoish in the end; fucking cool.
Felt bad that Saddam Hussein was done with. As I watched the string of sequences of a video clipping on TV, I felt something was so hugely incorrect. There was this unspoken-message reflecting: "We'll fuck you anyway now!" Wwas wondering: why watch Desperate Housewives when you can watch Bush-Blair on CNN and BBC.
What makes everything crap: The Noida sick-bastard that kills, rapes and sells organs (allegedly) mostly children (both sex). It horrfies me!


Blogger Snake Anthony said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7:56 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Snake Anthony said...

The other thing about the first week of the year is that there typically still is alot of work to be done. It might be the beginning of a new calendar year but not the start of anything else new. *annoyed*

7:57 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger Zee said...

your point about ur friend's gf looking like keira knightley sounds like the movie luv actually....it's the keira knightley look to blame i'm guessing!!

11:22 PM, January 02, 2007  
Blogger whitelight said...

The Departed. Awesome dude. Awesome. And I think I have said enough (though you never can) about Gimme Shelter.

2:51 PM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger IR said...

departed - great film man

"Chattarpur, with a South Delhi accent -- where some four-hundred-and-twenty-six half-undressed women were sipping their stirred Martinis ..........."-- dont we all dream of such a new year !

happy double O 7 !

5:50 PM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger serendipity said...

hick...hick..hurray! u seemed to have had quite an adventurous new year. but i can't believe u waited this long to see The Departed. its kick ass innit?

6:57 PM, January 03, 2007  
Blogger priya said...

Morons are everywhere in this world.

8:17 AM, January 04, 2007  
Blogger That Armchair Philosopher said...

great post :) and keira? Really? Seriously? I <3. Sigh.

:) Departed - Brilliant movie. There's that song by the Dropkick Murphy's too - Shipping up to Boston. Good stuff.

Saddam - yes, I almost made my own first post of the new year one with bitter sweet leanings, but decided not to. I WAS horrified at the execution though - not because he was killed, but because of the simplicity by which it happened. I guess its a complicated viewpoint, not having been directly affected by his atrocities.

Noida killers- Seriously. Couldn't agree more. The world id so full of sickos. And then there was that bombay incident where a group of 50 people tried to fondle a girl with her boyfriend taking a stroll on the beach or something. How debauched ARE people anyway?

3:03 PM, January 04, 2007  
Blogger Ruchika said...

Hey... happy new yr! Believe me, I know all about crappy mornings this whole first week, esp coz I feel so cold in Delhi! Hehe..

Ok, I want to ask.. how many people got that there is actually a twist in the story in the last scene of The Departed?! Coz many people refuse to agree with me, but I'm convinced that the last scene where camera closes in on the rat is supp to imply something (too much to actually write down!)... coz Scorsese never puts a single scene which doesn't have "meaning"!!

And yes its truly disgusting the level to which people have lowered themselves, molesting women in public like that, molesting children man!!

10:28 AM, January 05, 2007  
Blogger Fortunata said...

Hey Jerry, back finally and does it feel good!! Post coming up soon and in the meantime going through all that you wrote and loving it!

3:06 PM, January 05, 2007  
Blogger medusa said...

blog rolled ya
i dunno how to play the fool, unles when i want to profess undying love to some one.
loved the departed as well
hated saddam killing. killing only it is. the new year first week has been fucked, emotionally and otherwise, so i totally understand what u mean

7:02 PM, January 06, 2007  
Blogger jerry said...

Snake A: You've got a very rational reasoning to why its been such a pissing off week. It started so wastedly.

zee: Good point man. She's quite a cute chick man, and has that look to her. Although, I thought the Desdemona you would figure more.

whitelght: You just can't with Gimme Shelter. What a fuckin' cool song!

ir: Thank you, to you too. Glad you liked my dream.

seren: You bet babe! Its a mind-fucker!

priya: That's a truism, I tell ya. :)

TAP: Dude, things are getting really so fuckin crazy man. 'Debauched', this is really sick-wrong happening.

Ruchika: I guess I got it. The 'rat' -- everytime I think of it, I have Jack Nicholson making a face of a rat in my mind -- is this amazing paradox. Its brilliant, the movie.

F: So good to know you're back! I'm so happy! How've you been, te adventures? Tell us all.

medusa: :) Read your post, wish I loved a love one like that!

9:56 PM, January 06, 2007  
Blogger Y? said...

i feel bad that saddam was done with too.It's scarier to have a society like us where plain barbarism is masked so prettily than to have plain honest barbarism.
And I can't believe the way these videos are being marketed by the media. Yahoo advertised 'a new video that was up ...' ...How important do you think it is for the media to actually show second by second progression of the mans death.

10:34 PM, January 13, 2007  
Blogger Y? said...

and the first week hangover has stretched into he second for me! :(

10:35 PM, January 13, 2007  

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